In a Difficult Spot

Just like Anui in the image below, we are in a difficult spot. As mentioned in our last post, we are staying in Melbourne while we wait for Wade’s Brachytherapy and follow up checks. It is going to take longer than we hoped.

Between our medical issues, the frustrations with boat maintenance, and the deteriorating state of Chris’s Dad, we have had a lot to deal with. You do need a sense of purpose and optimism about life overall to handle what is thrown at you. Our health and well being depends most on our attitude. We are keeping our chin up, but believe us, some days are harder than others.

Between Wade and Papa

Three and a half years after Wade was diagnosed with Prostate cancer, and 10 days after being told it is now time to take action, we have seen the Radiographer. The process of mapping the prostate and ordering the radioactive seeds from the US starts next week. The brachytherapy itself won’t happen for about three weeks and there will be follow ups afterwards for the next month. So we have extended our booking at the Yarra’s Edge Marina until mid April.

Waiting for the main event is a bit tough. Once you have made the treatment decision, you want to get on with it… and quickly! Waiting around is not our strong point. At least evenings at Yarra’s Edge are spectacular and Bengie appreciates the quiet time at the marina!

Those who know Wade will realise he takes things in his stride. Nothing much rattles him; he does not project too far ahead and is an optimist who does not let too many set backs get to him.

Those who know Chris will understand she is not as cool, calm and collected! A reason for being anxious is the fact Wade’s impending procedure coincides with the worsening condition of Papa back in France. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer three years ago and after two and a half years of chemo he is now in palliative care close to his family in Toulouse, but deteriorating rapidly. He has been hospitalised and it is unlikely he will return to his apartment. Morphine helps keep the pain at bay and there is some hope a blood transfusion will help him a little, but he is weak.

So there you have it, an impossible situation: a case of wanting to be in two places at once. We are praying for a few weeks’ breathing space so Chris can first be here for Wade and then see her Dad, but we don’t know whether we will get this. Have you ever been in such a situation? How did you manage?

35 thoughts on “In a Difficult Spot

  1. Life does throw many challenges at us, but knowing the love and compassion you have for each other and family I know you will see it through this rough patch together and please know that all of us are thinking of you and trust that calmer seas and bluer skies do lay ahead. Our love to you both. Henry and Brenda

  2. My thoughts and prayers for you both and dad in France. 🙏🏻 I am dealing with kidney stones in both kidneys, working with urologist and other doctors to have Lithotripsy soon. Other family members are feeling under the weather. It’s everywhere it seems. Beautiful photos!

  3. My heart goes out to you, Chris, during this really difficult time. There is no perfect solution, alas, but it seems like you have to make a decision soon about where you geographically want/need to be in the upcoming month. My only hope is that you avoid second-guessing yourself. Once you decide, the rest is in God’s hand. Best wishes for Wade’s upcoming surgery. I may have similar issues to his, although I am at an earlier stage of deciding whether a biopsy should be done.

    • Hi Mike – Wade is my focus right now. Once the decision is made as you say the rest is in God’s hands.

      Thinking about your situation, we both say the biopsy is the only sure way of identifying abnormal cells. Blood tests fluctuate and MRIs don’t show anything. Wade adds don’t delay – it’s much easier to deal with anything small and you have more treatment options.

  4. Hi Chris and Wade,
    Just caught up with your blog. Sorry to hear about your health problems, and your current dilemma, but, like others, appreciate your frankness. At least Anui looks safe and secure (although perhaps the photos belie the actual situation on the water). My two bob’s worth would be to go straight to France before Wade has his radiotherapy, after a long conversation with your dad’s oncologist, but there’s really no good right answer is there and I guess you need to follow your instinct in situations like these, after talking through the pros and cons of both decisions.
    Hope to see you again up here in happier times, and before too long.

    • Hi Meredith – lovely to get your comment. Just had some advice from the encologist in France. It seems we still have some time, hopefully enough to be here for Wade first.
      Our path north will definitely include Port Mac… just a bit later than we would have liked! See you then.

  5. Life throws curve-balls. You can only be in one place and do one thing at a time. At the moment the place is Melbourne methinks . . . may there be time to travel across the world after this chapter comes to a satisfactory conclusion. My earnest best wishes travel your way . . . day by day . . . .

  6. I had just one of my biopsy samples showing bad cells. Back about 10 years ago I went straight to robotic radical prostatectomy. All subsequent PSA test came back as undetectable for years. Now they only do a PSA on me each few years.
    These days they don’t need to rush to radical surgery and thus avoid some side effects. The diagnosis is very unpleasant but the treatments are very effective. Hope it all goes well and you are sailing north again soon.

    • True Robert, they have vastly improved the techniques and use anaesthetic for the biopsies. No pain involved. We trust they will blast those cancer cells for good and we can get back to having fun!

  7. We don’t know you and have only recently found your blog, but I just wanted to reach out and express my empathy during this difficult and uncertain time in your life. I hope that Wade’s treatment goes smoothly and that are also able to get to France to be with your father in the coming months. What a heart-wrenching scenario. I haven’t read back far enough to get a sense of how much community you have in Melbourne, but we are here, too (though our boat is now in Hobart). If a hello or a coffee with new faces would be welcomed during this chapter, do let us know! If not, know that a pair of strangers is sending positive energy your way. -Jessie

    • Thank you Jessie, that is very kind. We are originally from Melbourne with family here too, but always welcome visitors. So if you are walking through the Docklands we would love to meet you.

  8. Chris & Wade
    Our thoughts are with you. Just know that whatever way you decide to go will be the right decision.
    Hope we can catch up soon
    Tom & Lou xx

    • Hello Tom & Lou – so nice to get your comment. Wade is my focus for now, we will see how things develop. Can’t wait to get to the Lakes, get back to our old port and catch up with you. We haven’t sailed for months and by the time we leave Melbourne we will well and truly be in a state of withdrawal!

  9. Hi Chris and Wade, My thoughts are with you both for the troubled times ahead.
    I am still in NZ with my 2 patients.
    I will give you a call when I get back to Australia next month.

  10. Difficult days. Thinking of you both. Have only met you once, but we can relate strongly, having been through similar situations health wise. We are in the process of moving Deb’s parents into care, closing up the house, an emotional time. Transitions are never easy. Praying for you both. Pete & Deb.

  11. We saw Anui from the Williamstown ferry on Monday morning. First time we have seen it “in the flesh” but from some distance 😦
    We sail Cyan, a Crowther Twiggy out of Paynesville and look forward to seeing Anui (and you guys) out sailing on the Gippsland Lakes soon. If you need help bringing her around and aren’t flooded with offers of help, email us.

    • P.S. I hope the better side of life shines thru the gloom more and more often.

    • Hi Michael & Robyn, Looking forward to meeting you when we get to the Lakes… sometimes in April maybe! We won’t need a hand, but we will give you a yell when we are in there so we can all catch up and check out each other’s Crowther! If you are in Melbourne, feel free to pop in at Yarra’s Edge. We will email you our details.

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