We have shitty news to share: the abnormality on Chris’s breast is confirmed as cancer. It goes without saying that our trip to Tasmania is now officially cancelled.
Even though we expected it, we still feel swamped. We are both doing it tough, Chris especially.
We have had some big waves wash over us in the past few years. It was not so long ago that Wade went through his own prostate cancer journey. Now it is Chris’s turn. With 1 in 7 women getting breast cancer and 1.3 men in 10 afflicted by prostate cancer, we have both ended up on the wrong side of the stats.
This wave is a real high one, but we will somehow surface and stay afloat. Given the news, cursing is totally appropriate and in fact encouraged. So here we go:
- Putain (French)
- Mierda (Spanish)
- Merda (Portuguese)
- Fuck, Fuck, Fuck!
Now here is a challenge for you. Send us your translations in other languages you know! Because as suggested by our faithful follower Eha last week, it’s time to look in the mirror and let it rip with every swear word we know!
The details
Breast cancer is a catch-all term for all sorts of evils. The condition for Chris is Invasive Carcinoma – mixed ductal and lobular type. Two for the price of one… how lucky can you get! The tumour is a grade 2 out of 3 (cells that look different to normal cells and are growing faster than normal cells, but not aggressively like a 3); it is 13mm in size which is considered small. The stage of development of the cancer which denotes the spread of it will be confirmed after surgery and further pathology but we have been told they could not find anything suspect in the lymph nodes in the initial tests so hopefully it is Stage I (I being no spread to other tissue or lymph nodes and IV being metastatic).
The treatment options and chances of recovery usually are based on how early the cancer is found and how much it has spread. Thankfully the prognosis for Chris is good. The treatment will involve surgery, likely followed by several weeks of radiation therapy.
Again we stress it is not until we knew where the suspect spot was that we could vaguely feel something. But all tests picked the tumour up clearly. So have your regular mammograms, girls. It is about protecting your quality of life, your longevity, and the life of the ones dear to you… your partner, your family. And guys, make sure your better half gets it done.
At this stage, although these are not the best of news, we thank our lucky stars it has been picked up early. It is easier to deal with any nasty if it is small. You might end up with a chunk of flesh missing, but you are alive and kicking, able to eventually get on with what you choose to do with your life!
Distraction
It was a slow going week: a few strolls, little beach walks with Bengie, Netflix binging in the horrible weather, visits from a couple of cruising buddies.
The day prior to getting the news the pressure was intense so we distracted ourselves by going up to the Scenic Rim with our friend Bill to be in the middle of nature. There is something soothing about hearing bird song and inhaling the smell of eucalyptus. Here are a few pictures:
It was quite moody in the rain, and we stretched our legs with a rainforest walk between showers. Although we had packed our boots, we did not wear them and went in sandals… MISTAKE!
We were walking in Indian file: Bill first with his brand new hip, Chris second, Wade third. We are blaming Bill for what happened next. We were attacked by legions of leeches. Bill stirred them up, Chris collected a whole heap, Wade got a few left overs. Mind you it gave Chris an excuse to freak out about something other than breast cancer! OMG there were so many of the little bastards on our feet, between our toes, up our legs… We persevered with the loop walk. When we got back to the car, Chris was very thorough at ensuring there were no leeches left on her… the boys less so. A couple of hours later as we were driving back, it was Bill and Wade’s turn to get agitated: by then they had big juicy sausages gorging on their feet and ankles and blood everywhere! Next time… don’t care how hot it is: boots and gaiters on!
What’s Next?
All the medicos are acting swiftly. The very morning we were briefed about the diagnosis, the file was sent to our GP at Sovereign Medical Centre. Quick as a flash, he saw us that afternoon and organised the referral to the surgeon who happens to be the Medical Director of BreastScreen Queensland. We have an appointment with him Monday next week in Southport, when hopefully we will get a date for the actual surgery as a private patient. It would have been too slow to be taken care of in the public health system – free, but slow… we don’t do slow on Anui! There is a reason we pay exorbitant premiums for private health cover: you don’t have to wait for months to get treatment – mind you there are still steep out of pocket expenses to pay. But with cancer, speed is of the essence.
Now that we are moving into the intervention phase, hopefully things will be somewhat less anxious. The next few months will be far from pleasant, but that’s the hurdle we have to get over.
During this time, we will keep documenting our medical journey because it is a stress management tool for Chris and might be a useful information source for our readers.
Remember to send us your best swear words. Be brave and comment on this post also, even if you talk to us. Some people say ‘I don’t know what to say’. It is not that hard… just write your reactions, your thoughts, anything. From our point of view reading your words helps. Silence is as crappy as waiting!
Sv-Anui 
Oh Chris & Wade
What a terrible time you are going through!
Sadly, I know it only too well.
The waiting, anxiety and ‘not knowing’ all pile up on you. It’s such a whirlwind of unexpected and unpleasant processes.
I’m SO GLAD you seem to have caught this thing early and that you were able to escape to the Scenic Rim (I HATE Leeches!😵💫).
I’m still trying to think of a swear word bad enough to cover your situation – most don’t even come close!
Matty
Hello Matty, I know this would take you back to dark places and for this I am sad. There is a silver lining for us, even if right now I find it hard to look that far.
Exactly Chris!
You have every chance to slam this bugger early and get back to your amazing lifestyle.
“Vanfuculo off” To the Cancer!!!!!
Vaffanculo!!!
(Italian version of Fuck!!!)
Excellent Matty and it really sings when I shout it with gusto!
Not being multilingual has its drawbacks. I’m stuck with damn, blast, hells’s bells etc, none of which really capture the depth of shittiness.
It is so good that you’ve been diligent and had the checks which find these cancers early and now all is in motion for the appropriate care. We are very lucky that we have the resources available to us.
And as for those friendly leeches, ewwwwwwh. Thank goodness medicine has advanced or they might have been part of the treatment.
Well done Ann, you made us laugh! And yes being diligent with the checks is crucial.
Hi Chris
My thoughts and prayers are with you. There is a line in a song, if wishes were fishes, we would all cast nets in the sea. So like all that follow you I will be fishing for you and wishing the best for you.
The power of the mind is quite incredible when you have finished swearing at it, imagine putting it in a locked bag and shrinking it until it can be removed.
Love and best wishes.
John
Nice sentiments and imagery to hold onto. Thanks John.
Good old Africaans …. FOK!
I have an unshakeable belief that you will overcome this. In the meantime, treat yourself kindly.
Hi Su – yes we think so too, just have to deal with the crappy bit in the middle!
Hi Chris. More crap! Love the moody Scenic Rim. Hate the idea of leeches (roll on ‘aeroguard’ gets them to drop off immediately!) I have delayed my breast screen until next year because the state reporting systems don’t automatically talk to each other… I have already had issues changing from Vic to QLD. As for expletives… try catso/cazzo in Italian. The word can be translated/used several ways; a couple of them are very relevant! I will call you later. x T
Hi Trish, the state systems don’t talk to each other so they don’t see the history and in my case the Victorian history just sits there. I chose to do the last 3 in QLD because that’s where we were spending the most time. Don’t delay… get it done wherever you are. Nasties can move awfully quickly. And yes it is a Prick of a thing!
The Irish, I believe, say ‘Feck’. There’s often a heck of a lot of ‘Fecken’ in their conversations, that’s for sure. In Amhaic, (Ethiopian) I don’t know what their word for fuck is but they do use the word “izoosh” a lot. It means “be strong”. I offer it to you both with the utmost, heartfelt sincerity.
Kindest regards, Mary.
Hi Mary, thanks for ‘izoosh’ – we need a good dose of that!
Isn’t it funny the words you pick up when people are talking around you and you don’t understand a great deal. Thank for the Irish input too!
Ficken (German) well having said that, let me say it again ficken! ScheiBe comes to mind as well (shit) pronounced scheisser By the way it has been scientifically proven that loud swearing somewhat relieves pain especially if you have hit your fingers with a hammer when nailing something. Stay strong you two, you have many friends that will be thinking of you and support you through this shitty time. All our love Henry and Brenda
Hey Henry & Brenda – double Ficken sounds perfect. And the thought of hitting your fingers with a hammer… now there’s a distraction! Appreciate getting your message.
CRAP
The very best of luck with treatment Chris and Wade.
Go team, you’ve got this!
Thanks Daz!
Hi Chris, Merd, merd, merd! Glad that you will be getting swift treatment, and I trust that you will be be given very good care. After my last check up in November, I am now part of a Breastscreen Qld breast density study – something that I was asked to participate in at the time. Assisting research is not a hard thing to do.
As for the leeches…like many…I dislike them immensely and will take on your advice to always wear gaiters and boots for walking.
Take care
Jan xx
Thanks Jan – other than the stuff up with the initial recall notification, I have found BreastScreen QLD very supportive. Good on you for taking part in the study. It all helps to improve diagnosis.
Hi Chris, My prayers will include you my friend! ❤️ I’ll pass on the swear words, guys but I totally understand. I have paid for my monthly medical insurance for many years, it’s incredibly expensive! Sometimes I think that we should adopt the medical care system that Canada and the United Kingdom have. No system is perfect, but this would help millions of people. Be well! 🙏🏻❤️
Hi John, yes private health insurance is very expensive but at times like this you are glad you have it. I have had several serious medical interventions over the years and had I not had cover, I would have been unable to afford treatment and I’d be dead by now or very incapacitated.
I am glad that you’ve been able to cover the costs, we get one crack at this life. Make it count! 👍🏻❤️
OK! Now you know and can begin and already have started the resolution. You seem to have some very knowledgeable, dependable and helpful pros around you. Glad you have the private insurance – sadly for many Aussies these days that does make a difference. The size of the growth is small – when mine was discovered there were two side-by-side lumps both about twice your diameter. I had a mastectomy which has never really bothered me – you may only have a lumpectomy – see what the doc advises. Please believe me – since matters are now moving you will (most of the time) feel much better and more productive. With your usually very healthy and active lifestyle methinks your body will repair at a faster rate than many. Looking forward to the next chapter . . . and do not talk about leeches . . . been there too > yuck !!! love and hugs and . . .
Thank you so much Eha. Your words of wisdom and experience help. The day of the briefing I kept it together, but the next I was crushed, unable to get up or move. Cried my eyes out. Now it’s up a little, down a little. Have made a few decisions which will help us cope. More on that next week.
Sorry to hear, Chris.
Glad you have found it early and at least you started treatment early with a course of leeches!
A course of leeches! They were around the feet not the breast! But if you think it’s a good idea let me know and I’ll go back up there topless… anything for a distraction!
Well I’m not quite up on my 16th century doctoring skills, but I think it was about getting the ‘bad blood’s out so not sure that leech placement was optimised, but if you feel that you need to go wandering around the bush topless… you’re right it might be a distraction!
Nope… too scary all round!
“Kuso” Chris !!! (About as bad an expletive in Japanese as possible). So sorry to hear such bad news!!! I hope you get excellent treatment and care.
Thinking of you.
Love
Waz and Lisa
Good addition to the list, Waz! Stay in touch!
Such an honest & brave post Chris. And as always, well written & even amusing in such painful circumstances. (BTW I HATE leeches.) I hope your regular updates can offer you some positive focus each week. I would love to be bilingual, but I’m afraid my French petered out in Form 4 … but a very close friend of mine who has learnt Italian & whose partner is Italian has suggested targeting the cancer directly with your screams … “vai a fancula”!!
Hi Amanda. Writing/journaling is a good way of channeling challenging emotions.
Yes I recognise the Italian… very similar to the French: va te faire foutre! I tell you what, I have enough of a collection of swear words to shout loudly, scare boats that come too close and clear an anchorage!
Best wishes. Most cancers are treatable these days.
Yes they are but it is still a crappy road to travel.
Hi Chris & Wade, Not the best news Chris, but we are supremely confident you will beat the bugger. As far as swear words go – a little true story for you, which as you are French, I am sure you will appreciate. A friend of ours, Howard Marsden, was the motor racing manager for Ford and later on for Nissan. George Furey was the driver of the Nissan Bluebird and in a particular race came into the pits where Howard, already in a bad mood, was waiting. Howard had a plumb in the mouth English accent and never ever used bad language. Lou and I can confirm that we had never heard him utter a swear word! The pit manager, who new how to swear plugged the computer into the car and immediately said “Fuck!”. Howard reacted angrily and said what’s wrong now!!!! The pit manager sheepishly replied “the computer battery is flat and I can’t get a bloody reading”. George Furey looked up in anticipation and for the first time ever they heard Howard swear!!!! He said “Oh, Horse Manure!!!” So you could try that one – I guess that’s “Crottin de Cheval”. All our best thoughts are with you. Tom & Lou xx
>
Ah, Tom, crottin de cheval is a bit gentile! I am more into Putain de bordel de merde… something that exercises the lungs and has the advantage of clearing the crowds parked too close to us cos there’s a mad woman on Anui!
Dear Chris,
Stay strong and be positive. It’s been discovered early and you have a good prognosis. Yes, it is shitty and a PITA but you have so many friends on your side.
Wishing you a comfortable passage.
Chris & Suzanne
Discovery II
Thanks guys, trying to keep our chin up and get on with it!
Hi Chris, there are no words I could cobble together that would get this monkey off your back. My mum and dad were Latvian, so that was my first language. Guess what, they didn’t teach me any swear words! What a deprived childhood that was!
Otherwise, in times of suffering, a tenet I like, is about suffering leading to perseverance, which leads to hope.
Perhaps a bit like the angst experienced when tied to a tow cable. Then there’s the effort and work in thermalling till the hope and joy of floating under soft white cloud 💖🌥️
I just thought of an equally bad cricketing analogy, when this fast bowler kept hitting me (with the ball) but as you’re french I doubt you’d understand it 🥴. Thoughts and prayers with you all the way!
How pathetic, Elgar, here I was hoping for some pearls from you!
Ok, you are right, I get the paragliding under tow analogy, I totally don’t get the cricket one – you are right there! But yes your message about suffering, perseverance and hope. We are lousy at suffering, bloody good at perseverance though, so maybe there is hope for a return to a gentle, enjoyable life.
Chris, am I sensing a glimmer of hope? Let’s all raise our collective glasses to hope! 🍷
You didn’t get the cricket analogy because I didn’t finish it. Ok, here goes, Wade might have to explain it to you 😉
Picture fast bowler bowls a bouncer at your head. You go to hook, miss and your head, jaw stops the ball’s progress. Blood everywhere, mates rush onto field offering help and commiserations. Stoically or stupidly we wipe off the blood and continue batting. Next ball. Also a bouncer, I go to hook, bottom edge, ball goes into bread basket. I’m doubled over mates on field again, same, same. Next ball, another bouncer! You think a bloke would wise up and learn to duck?!? Anyway, this time I hooked him for 6! Suffering, yes, perseverance?(maybe it was stupidity) but there was definitely hope and joy and a fluffy cloud at the end of it all.
I just thought of another story about Tony the ex hell’s angel, ex drug addict who threatened to kill me, but I’ll save that one for the next time we’re lucky enough to share a meal with you guys!
Ok, I did not quite get the foreign language but Wade came to the rescue… I got the gist of the story… hurt, keep at it regardless, there is hope and maybe fun in the end.
And actually I can tell you that today has been a good day: lots of messages from a supportive group of people, a few laughs – that’s precious and gives me hope!
*laugh* Nope, Milady . . . there are three in this ‘party’ and one may not like!!! His birth language!!!
Meanwhile hope tomorrow will bring a few comforting ‘ticks’ to your story . . . hugs
😞
My apologies on a Sunday afternoon but I am very proud of myself for not giving you a florid lesson in Latvian swearing!!! Because that is the most brilliant in the Baltics! Uhuh, I am one of those ‘dreadful’ Estonians to the north of you and my favourite auntie (out of eight!) married the then Police Commissioner of Latvia. So!!! And there are pages and pages and pages of very literal and literary swear words in the language . . . nope, parents are rather backward in teaching such, but . . . best to you . . . and Chris – best for tomorrow to you too!
Ok, Eha, time for the quick Latvian swearword lesson! Come on, give us your best!
Hey Eha, I don’t know you, but it seems like we have a Baltic connection! I’m now going to put my hands over my ears, I think it’s way too late in life for me to be hearing rude Latvian (or even Estonian) language.
Cerams, ka mūsu draudzene ātri izārstēsies!
Hey sailors, I can’t seem to navigate the reply thingy on your blog thingy, but sorry to hear about your Scheißhaus news. Stay strong, stay safe. Steve.
Well you must have managed Steve! Thanks for your message.
Yes Chris and Wade, Jackie (who’s my wife I don’t think you’ve met ) and myself feel some of the anguish of your condition and join with so many others (above) in encouraging you to be brave and beat this cancer as you work thru the process .
Much love, thought and prayers are supporting you both ! 😍 🙏
Hi Doug , yes we did meet Jackie at Lakes Entrance when we were there during the first Covid lockdown. Thanks for saying hello and for your encouragement.
Just read your post Chris. Dam … not the news you were hoping for. We loved living aboard, but it made us aware of the logistical reality of managing personal and family issues. We’ll be thinking of you as you sit-out yet another summer in the Broadwater. Sounds like you have a good support network, but we have connections there if you need anything. Pete & Deb.
Thanks Pete & Deb – yes it is disappointing and quite brutal, but I s you say people rallying around us which is important. Be well and happy. Thanks for saying hello.
Oh … and our leech story. Tied up on the Lauriton Services Club jetty, we did the North Brothers hill walk on a drizzly day. The darn things were perched up on leaves & branches wiggling around, just waiting for us to brush past. I’d never seen that before. I thought I had got away with it, until we got back and I took off my socks. Two big brutes. I yelped!
Good one Pete. Yap, can’t stand the beasts!
Hey Chris and Wade. I’m very sad to hear your bad news. But on the bright side you caught it early and are able to do something about it. Best wishes for a speedy recovery.
Colleen and David xxoo
Hi Colleen and David, thanks for saying hello.